Slightly remiss..

Sorry. Have been MIA, off the grid, incognito…basically consumed by Christmas madness, so this post shall be a whirlwind update of the crazy-ass ride that was December in our household!!

Hair is still straight. Hairdresser truly is a witch with actual magical frickin’ powers!! I can wash it, towel dry it, run my fingers through it and BAM it stays poker-straight for 3 days. May divorce husband and marry hairdresser??

The Christmas fair was an astounding success. Couldn’t sleep for the week beforehand, kept having that ‘naked in the corridor’ dream except in this middle-class SAHM version I was running around with a clipboard, someone had hidden all the trestle tables and I couldn’t find the raffle tickets. Go figure! Anyway, it was all amazing, people shopped, children laughed, everyone spent money and we made almost double than the previous year. Boom! Only downside was the breakdown in communication at the end of the evening when I arrived home at 9pm to find a shattered toddler on the sofa watching inappropriate TV while Fun Auntie just offered up the explanation ‘well his Daddy said he could wait up for you…’ The fact that my husband thought I was 5/10mins behind him, had then buggered off out to his work Christmas party and I didn’t come home until 2hours after the toddler’s bedtime had apparently not raised any red flags in my darling sister’s brain…ho hum!

What else? Oh yes, we have sold our house. After countless viewings which saw me throwing countless random items into countless random drawers/cupboards/boxes and then not rediscovering them for weeks at a time, someone finally made an offer (ironically it was the one time I didn’t have time to hoover, who knew?, buyers like dog hair) and we may have shrieked YES down the phone so loudly that the estate agent laughed out loud. Then we panicked that we had nowhere to buy, started a mental search, found one I loved and then rowed for 48hrs over husband’s reluctance to buy it instantly. In the end he agreed I could make a ridiculously low offer, which I did but the vendor implied it was less than the competing offer and THEN it all went a bit crazy and I MAY have accidentally made an offer for more than we had agreed and so MAY have bought a house so am now ignoring phone calls from numbers I don’t recognise. Oops. He knows I can’t resist winning. This is why I’m banned from ebay. Fuck!

Boys had a wonderful Christmas. We stayed at home and husband cooked a roast for the first time in his life. Bit of a gamble but it was am-ah-zing! My current funk means that I haven’t been able to face decorating the tree, nagging him into hanging the outside lights, planning the usual feast… It’s just all been so hard this year. I don’t know why when I was on an upwards spiral but I suspect it’s to do with Baby being the same age Toddler was when my Dad got so ill? They look so similar, and I saved so many clothes and toys that are now getting reused, sometimes it’s like 2012 all over again and I can hardly breathe. But anyway, Husband has been a superstar and took control of the big day. We stuck to the rule of ‘play, read, want, need’ with our gifts and it worked really well. Christmas can be such a time of excess and greed, and they had MORE than enough from extended family and friends, they want for nothing.

Baby is about to crawl. I am literally willing him to put all 4 limbs into gear and get moving. I know I’ll be kicking myself as soon as he does but he gets so bloody frustrated rocking back and forth on his tummy and the incessant shrieking is getting quite wearing. 

Golly, I thought I had loads to update you on but it turns out my life really is just school admin, being blue and children. Bugger!

The house search continues, project get-my-husband-to-agree-to-private-school goes on, and I’m determined to start ironing this year. No longer will my family look like they’ve been dressed in crumpled tissue paper (damn you, tumbledryer!) I shall also try not to be so crap at writing posts on here…which sounds freakishly like something I have written before??