21 January 2016

This week so far...

Things we have learned so far this week:

1. Either the boiler is dying or the unprecedented drop in temperature outside is making us finally realise that, ooh fuck, this house is cold. The boiler is currently 'on' (as opposed to on timed, Husband is in London for a few nights, what he doesn't know won't hurt him!) and my fingers are freezing. Baby is watching Hey Duggee in a fleecy jumper under a blanket and I am refusing to take my shoes off incase my feet turn into blocks of ice. Hmm...will need to investigate. Luckily, Husband is home tonight so can light a fire to thaw us all out. Mental note: put boiler back on timed before 8pm.

2. Baby is determined and stubborn and a little bit shrieky. He went into his first proper meltdown yesterday because I emptied his potty and he was LOUD. Let me clarify, I don't think he has a weird poo fetish, I just think he wanted to flush it down the toilet himself and stupid Mama got there first. Man, did I learn my lesson. His little face was pure anguish! 

3. Boy did his first escape attempt on the school drive this morning, a proper 'turn and run into oncoming cars' whilst screaming malarkey. I was juggling Baby, a juice bottle and a book bag so had to grab him by his coat collar and pray he didn't wriggle free. All over some gloves. Needless to say, I am spending today close to tears and expecting a call to say he is still crying and that I need to come and collect him. Yet another experience where I think 'well you handled that like a complete dipshit, must try harder...' Sad face!

4. If you have no childcare so have to send apologies to the PLA meeting, consequently have no phone signal and do not receive the four messages saying 'I might just ask everyone to meet at yours for the meeting instead then...', 'Would you mind?', 'Hello?', and 'Is that OK?'...until 7.15pm do not assume that Posh Mama has not in fact gone ahead and rearranged everyone to come to your house at 8pm. Have never tidied so fast after bedtime in my entire life! The woman is a liability!! I do enjoy attending meetings in my pjs though and she brought crisps so...

5. Husband is in London this week and so far the only contact we have had from him is a simple text requesting I record 'The Mystery of Oak Island' last night because he was going to miss it. No romantic messages, no requests for present ideas, no indication that he is homesick and full of pangs...this is the man who comes out in a rash if I suggest any activity in the big smoke. Meanwhile, here I am holding down the fort in the sticks, just dithering under a blanket and recording crap on Sky. Grr!

6. Boy now needs to wear his hair tied back for PE lessons, something which has caused no end of grief for his Mama. In theory he's fine with it, just needs a bit of encouragement and support when physically DOING it in class. What he doesn't need, at the tender impressionable age of 4, is for a member of staff to suggest he has all his hair cut off. Fucks' sake. Now I'm the bitch who won't let him get his hair cut and therefore am the bitch who's making him wear a hair bobble. Double grr!

7. Baby does not like pasta carbonara. My dining room wall can testify to this fact.

8. Only drinking on a Friday is hard work, especially when you Husband fucks off down south and leaves you alone with two angry children and no chocolate in the house!

I think that's it so far. Anything else that I've learned has been frozen out of my brain and is now gone... Alas!

Kind of looking forward to tomorrow and kind of dreading the whole shebang. Boys are spending the weekend with my mother while we escape to Bristol for a 30th birthday party and I'm beginning to think that heading over there tomorrow straight after school is the best plan? Fancy pants trip to Cheltenham overnight to reconnect as couple has been cancelled due to Husband constantly bitching and moaning about finances (paying two mortgages will do that after a year, I suppose, but am still grumpy about it!) but I still need to get the boys and all their gear to Lichfield in a timely fashion so that we can meet friends for lunch on Saturday. Obviously, I will pack everything and make sure everything is in the car. Husband will, at a push, pack his own shirt for the party!

Must stop moaning, try and readjust my stinky attitude and cheer up before 3.30pm. Want to collect Boy from school in a sunshiney mood and enjoy a film on the sofa together before bed. Must salvage the day...

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